Author Topic: Garrys reimported Jokes.  (Read 23452 times)

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Offline georg ruf jr.

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Re: Garrys reimported Jokes.
« Reply #45 on: September 20, 2008, 10:30:39 AM »
Why he signed.


Quick! Check this before Micky or Goofy come around....
Nothing special. Just some clips I put in youtube.de
http://de.youtube.com/results?search_query=bigbug74&search_type=&aq=f
Please comment! It may help promote our volleyball-club.
Skype: bigbug74

Offline Bertie Horak

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Re: Garrys reimported Jokes.
« Reply #46 on: September 20, 2008, 11:02:27 AM »
 ha ha bravo
Oranjemund 1965-1982.

Offline georg ruf jr.

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Re: Garrys reimported Jokes.
« Reply #47 on: September 22, 2008, 05:56:39 PM »
Do you have feelings of inadequacy?

Do you suffer from shyness?

Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor or Pharmacist about Brandy.

Brandy is the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident
About yourself and your actions. Brandy can help ease you out of
Your shyness and let you tell the world that you're ready and willing to do
Just about anything.

You will notice the benefits of Brandy almost immediately and with
A regimen of regular doses you can overcome any obstacles that prevent
You from living the life you want to live.

Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past and you will
Discover many talents you never knew you had. Stop hiding and start living, with
Brandy. Brandy may not be right for everyone. Women who are
Pregnant or nursing should not use Brandy. However, women who
Wouldn't mind nursing or becoming pregnant are encouraged to try it.

Side effects may include dizziness, nausea, vomiting, incarceration,
Erotic lustfulness, loss of motor control, loss of clothing, loss of
Money, loss of virginity, delusions of grandeur, table dancing,
Headache, dehydration, dry mouth, and a desire to sing Karaoke and play all-night
Rounds of Strip Poker, Truth Or Dare, and Naked Twister.

WARNING:

The consumption of Brandy may make you think you are whispering
When you are not.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

WARNING:

The consumption of Brandy may cause you to tell your friends over
And over again that you love them.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

WARNING:

The consumption of Brandy may cause you to think you can sing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

WARNING:

The consumption of Brandy may lead you to believe that ex-lovers
Are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

WARNING:

The consumption of Brandy may make you think you can logically
Converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

WARNING:

The consumption of Brandy may create the illusion that you are
Tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

NOW JUST IMAGINE WHAT YOU COULD ACHIEVE WITH TEQUILA!!!

Nothing special. Just some clips I put in youtube.de
http://de.youtube.com/results?search_query=bigbug74&search_type=&aq=f
Please comment! It may help promote our volleyball-club.
Skype: bigbug74

Offline Paula Gottsch (Willson)

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Re: Garrys reimported Jokes.
« Reply #48 on: September 23, 2008, 01:07:52 PM »
Are you sure you can follow Paula???
 affe-red  arse ha ha


watch it Jnr!!!     meanpuff

 image201

Offline georg ruf jr.

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Re: Garrys reimported Jokes.
« Reply #49 on: September 23, 2008, 09:12:15 PM »
A bad day!
Nothing special. Just some clips I put in youtube.de
http://de.youtube.com/results?search_query=bigbug74&search_type=&aq=f
Please comment! It may help promote our volleyball-club.
Skype: bigbug74

Offline georg ruf jr.

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Re: Garrys reimported Jokes.
« Reply #50 on: October 07, 2008, 06:29:26 PM »
My grandmother died in 1975, but her birthday is coming up, and that

Always

Causes me to reminisce. The long walks we used to take to the store, the

Quarters she gave me for meaningless jobs like pulling weeds or washing

The sidewalk... Those gems were all good, but the one I remember most,

The

Jewel in the crown of grandmotherly advice, occurred when I was only

About 10.

 

We were sitting in a park having just finished collecting some 40 soda

Bottles for the deposit money on a beautiful spring day. She told me

That one day, I would find a wonderful woman and start my own family.

 

"And remember always this thing," she said. "Be sure to marry a woman

With small hands."

 

"How come, Grandma?" I asked her. She answered in her soft voice..

 

"Makes your dick look bigger."

Nothing special. Just some clips I put in youtube.de
http://de.youtube.com/results?search_query=bigbug74&search_type=&aq=f
Please comment! It may help promote our volleyball-club.
Skype: bigbug74

Offline Florrie van Zyl (Muir)

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Re: Garrys reimported Jokes.
« Reply #51 on: October 07, 2008, 08:00:22 PM »
Oh Georg, that is priceless.
OPS 1969-1975, Centaurus 1975-1980

Offline Dalene Steenkamp (Coetzee)

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Re: Garrys reimported Jokes.
« Reply #52 on: October 07, 2008, 08:07:09 PM »
 sorriso2  Clever Grandma!    202
Life becomes harder for us when we live for others, but it also becomes richer and happier. Friendship is a sheltering tree.

To be clever enough to get a great deal of money, one must be stupid enough to want it.

Those who bring sunshine to the lives of other cannot keep it from themselves.

Offline Bertie Horak

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Re: Garrys reimported Jokes.
« Reply #53 on: October 08, 2008, 04:50:35 AM »
 image201 What a Grandma!  giverose
Oranjemund 1965-1982.

Offline Paula Gottsch (Willson)

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Re: Garrys reimported Jokes.
« Reply #54 on: October 10, 2008, 01:47:10 PM »
So Jnr, did you take your Grandma's advise???



(got to dodge the bullet now)    Turkey



 image201 image04

Offline Ricky Barron

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Re: Garrys reimported Jokes.
« Reply #55 on: October 10, 2008, 03:50:22 PM »
Hollywood Squares
If you remember the Original Hollywood Squares and its comics, this may bring a tear to your eyes. These great questions and answers are from the days when ' Hollywood Squares' game show responses were spontaneous, not scripted, as they are now. Peter Marshall was the host asking the questions, of course.
Q. Do female frogs croak?
A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough.
Q. If you're going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be?
A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.
Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years.
A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes.
Q. You've been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman?
A. Don Knotts: That's what's been keeping me awake.
Q. According to Cosmopolitan, if you meet a stranger at a party and you < /B>think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if he's married?
A. Rose Marie: No; wait until morning.
Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?
A. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency.
Q. In Hawaii an, does it take more than three words to say 'I Love You'?
A. Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty.
Q. What are 'Do It,' 'I Can Help,' and 'I Can't Get Enough'?
A. George Gobel: I don't know, but it's coming from the next apartment.
Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your hands while talking?
A. Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and I'll give you a gesture you' ll never forget.
Q. Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather?
A. Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.
Q. Charley, you've just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during the first year?
A. Charley Weaver: Of course not, I'm too busy growing strawberries.
Q. In bowling, what's a perfect score?
A. Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy.
Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist camps. One is politics, what is the other?
A. Paul Lynde: Tape measures.
Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet?
A. Rose Marie: Unfortunately Peter, I'm always safe in the bedroom.
Q. Can boys join the Camp Fire Girls?
A. Marty Allen: Only after lights out.
Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a goose do?
A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark?
Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?
A. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark.
Q. According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people?
A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.
Q. It is the most abused and neglected part of your body, what is it?
A. Paul Lynde: Mine may be abused, but it certainly isn't neglected.
Q. Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his head, what was he trying to do?
A. George Gobel: Get it in his mouth.
Q. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your elephant?
A. Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant?
Q. When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for its sex?
A. Charley Weaver: I'll lend him the car, the rest is up to him.
Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they?
A. Charley Weaver: His feet.
Q. According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do in bed?
A. Paul Lynde: Point and laugh.
 

Offline georg ruf jr.

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Re: Garrys reimported Jokes.
« Reply #56 on: October 10, 2008, 03:58:56 PM »
So Jnr, did you take your Grandma's advise???



(got to dodge the bullet now)    Turkey



 image201 image04


Do you think I need... ? Hey!!! How do you wanna know???
 madashell
Nothing special. Just some clips I put in youtube.de
http://de.youtube.com/results?search_query=bigbug74&search_type=&aq=f
Please comment! It may help promote our volleyball-club.
Skype: bigbug74

Offline georg ruf jr.

  • Oranjemunder from 1973 till 1979.... OPS:73 - 76St. Pauls College: 77 - 78
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Re: Garrys reimported Jokes.
« Reply #57 on: October 10, 2008, 04:02:03 PM »
Hollywood Squares
If you remember the Original Hollywood Squares and its comics, this may bring a tear to your eyes. These great questions and answers are from the days when ' Hollywood Squares' game show responses were spontaneous, not scripted, as they are now. Peter Marshall was the host asking the questions, of course.
Q. Do female frogs croak?
A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough.
Q. If you're going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be?
A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.
Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years.
A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes.
Q. You've been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman?
A. Don Knotts: That's what's been keeping me awake.
Q. According to Cosmopolitan, if you meet a stranger at a party and you < /B>think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if he's married?
A. Rose Marie: No; wait until morning.
Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?
A. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency.
Q. In Hawaii an, does it take more than three words to say 'I Love You'?
A. Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty.
Q. What are 'Do It,' 'I Can Help,' and 'I Can't Get Enough'?
A. George Gobel: I don't know, but it's coming from the next apartment.
Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your hands while talking?
A. Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and I'll give you a gesture you' ll never forget.
Q. Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather?
A. Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.
Q. Charley, you've just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during the first year?
A. Charley Weaver: Of course not, I'm too busy growing strawberries.
Q. In bowling, what's a perfect score?
A. Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy.
Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist camps. One is politics, what is the other?
A. Paul Lynde: Tape measures.
Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet?
A. Rose Marie: Unfortunately Peter, I'm always safe in the bedroom.
Q. Can boys join the Camp Fire Girls?
A. Marty Allen: Only after lights out.
Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a goose do?
A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark?
Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?
A. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark.
Q. According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people?
A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.
Q. It is the most abused and neglected part of your body, what is it?
A. Paul Lynde: Mine may be abused, but it certainly isn't neglected.
Q. Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his head, what was he trying to do?
A. George Gobel: Get it in his mouth.
Q. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your elephant?
A. Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant?
Q. When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for its sex?
A. Charley Weaver: I'll lend him the car, the rest is up to him.
Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they?
A. Charley Weaver: His feet.
Q. According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do in bed?
A. Paul Lynde: Point and laugh.
 



Do you know Garry too Ricky?? lol
Go ahead. Just feel cmfortable in this topic...
Nothing special. Just some clips I put in youtube.de
http://de.youtube.com/results?search_query=bigbug74&search_type=&aq=f
Please comment! It may help promote our volleyball-club.
Skype: bigbug74

Offline Ricky Barron

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Re: Garrys reimported Jokes.
« Reply #58 on: October 13, 2008, 04:12:46 PM »
Garry who?

Offline georg ruf jr.

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Re: Garrys reimported Jokes.
« Reply #59 on: October 13, 2008, 08:44:44 PM »
Garry who?

The topic is called "Garrys reimported jokes". Seeing that you posted a joke I thought you might know Garry....  ape ha ha
Nothing special. Just some clips I put in youtube.de
http://de.youtube.com/results?search_query=bigbug74&search_type=&aq=f
Please comment! It may help promote our volleyball-club.
Skype: bigbug74