Oranjemund Online

GENERAL DISCUSSIONS! => The Joke Corner for all => Topic started by: Patricia Lotte on January 28, 2009, 06:12:07 AM

Title: How to start a fight
Post by: Patricia Lotte on January 28, 2009, 06:12:07 AM
My wife and I were watching "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire" while we were in bed.
I turned to her and said, "Do you want to have sex?"
"No," she answered.
I then said, "Is that your final answer?"
She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying, "Yes."
So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend."
And then the fight started ....

*********
Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, grabbed the dog, and slipped quietly into the garage. I hooked up the boat up to the truck, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour. The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day.
I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, "The weather out there is terrible."

My loving wife of 10 years replied, "Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?"

And that's how the fight started ...

*********
I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the road and slowly the other driver got out of his car. You know how sometimes you just get soooo stressed and little things just seem funny? Yeah, well I couldn't believe it.... He was a DWARF!!!

He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted, "I AM NOT HAPPY!!!"

So, I looked down at him and said, "Well, then which one are you?"

And then the fight started .....

*********
I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first. "I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please." He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?"

"Nah, she can order for herself."

And then the fight started ....

*********
A woman is standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror. She is not happy with what she sees and says to her husband, "I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment."

The husband replies, "Your eyesight's darn near perfect."

And then the fight started .....
Title: Re: How to start a fight
Post by: georg ruf jr. on January 28, 2009, 10:11:19 AM
 trex-073 202
Title: Re: How to start a fight
Post by: Bertie Horak on January 28, 2009, 03:25:34 PM
  image201
Title: Re: How to start a fight
Post by: John Creedy on January 28, 2009, 03:40:02 PM
Thanks Patricia - good start to my day!
Title: Re: How to start a fight
Post by: Diana Rudd (Boehme) on January 28, 2009, 07:48:18 PM
Love It    sorriso2
Title: Re: How to start a fight
Post by: georg ruf jr. on February 02, 2009, 06:41:48 AM
Quote from: Diana Rudd (Boehme) on January 28, 2009, 07:48:18 PM
Love It    sorriso2

Why did I know that you would come in here Diana???
image201
Title: Re: How to start a fight
Post by: Gordon Brown on March 25, 2009, 10:47:33 AM
have a dig at NAMDEB!!!
Title: Re: How to start a fight
Post by: Paula Gottsch (Willson) on March 25, 2009, 01:11:37 PM
 ha ha image201 image201 image201 image201 image201