Dot Symes passed away yesterday .. I got a call from Clive today .. still dealing with it .. he will obviously post when he ready ... To the Symes family our heartfelt condolences ..
Truly sorry to hear of the death of your mother, Clive. She and Denis were pillars of the Oranjemund community. We first met on board ship, travelling together with several other families (Stan and Marge Gilmour, Ken and Mary Foster and one other Lancashire family whose name I've forgotten) all heading for Oranjemund.
We arrived on January 2, 1953, flying up from Cape Town in a WW2 "Gooney Bird", one of the old Dakotas flying out of Wingfield, which still had bucket seats. It was unpressurized and could only fly at 10,000 feet which meant it wallowed in the heat and a few felt very queasy. The flight took almost three hours. I think you were a very small boy at the time but may remember the trip.
Dot was incredible helpful and a great support during those early days of homesickness and nostalgia that affect all migrants. We arrived during a particularly long period of East Wind conditions that were horrific for anyone from the UK. We thought it was normal weather and were appalled, but Dot was irrepressibly upbeat and never allowed the sand and heat of what was then a fairly primitive Oranjemund situation ever to affect her good humour.
I'm sorry to hear of her passing, Clive. My condolences to you and your family.
Bob.
My condolences to you and family members Clive, I did meet your mum and worked with your father Dennis when he was on the gemsbok crew.
Frank.
I'm sorry to hear your mom passing away Clive.
My condolences to you and your family.
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your loved ones Clive.
Clive, sorry for your loss, I remember your mom, when she was still in Oranjemund when we started to work at the Spar, don't know why that sticks in my head... she always wanted to talk... with me.... mentioning my mom all the time.....
Sorry.,.
Hi Clive,
Sorry to hear the sad news regarding the passing on of your dear mother Dot.
To you Clive, brother John and respective families please accept our sincere condolences
Mike & Jenny
Clive - so sorry to hear about your loss. Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
To Clive and Family, John and Family, I am so sorry to hear about Aunty Dot,she was like a Aunty to me. I am thinking of you all,
My thoughts are with you at this sad time.We remember your mom very well.
bighug
Diana and Stephen
Our thoughts are with you Clive.......
The Barron family
Sorry to hear about your mom passing away, Clive
My sincere condolances to you and the family.
Sylvia
So sorry to hear of your loss, Our thought and prayers are with you all at this sad time.
The Brownless Family
Our deepest sympathies at the loss of such a wonderful person. I don't think I can remember Dot without a smile on her face. May she rest in peace.
Bev and Roger
Our thoughts are with you and your family Clive at the sad passing of your mum Dot
Pam and KeithXXXX
WE WISH YOU AND JOHN AND FAMILIES A LONG LIFE.....THE MACPHERSON FAMILY.
I FEEL TRULY HUMBLED .. A PERSONAL TRIBUTE
I managed to get my butt out of the factory in time enough to attend Auntie Dots memorial service at the Salvation Army Chapel hall in City center ... present were some old oranjemunders , the Greigs, Geraldine MaCkay Barbara and Paul Selby ,, and of course the venerable seemingly eternal Ena Bennet , pity some more could not be there ...
To put my thoughts into a nutshell .. we all cruise or motor through our own lifes journeys at time forgetting to stand still and reflect .. to try keep contact ... and then at times find ourselves surprised ,,, normally a passing of someone brings us to standstill and makes us think .. should we have tried harder ,, made more effort .. no judgement no angst but yes , should we not be doing so ?..
To get to the gist of what I'm saying .. Auntie Dot was one of my extended family ...the not by blood Aunts that watched over the growing up wildly children of the early Oranjemund .. I as a child always thought her to be a bit highly strung , but in retrospect see it as an echoing of Bobs words a stalwart , a pillar of the growing Oranjemund ... caring too much at times but yes caring and worrying about her own brood and others as well , every parent had their way of dealing with it , my parents more cool calm watching the events and only intervening when they felt necessary.. but all in their own way with an effect that remains lasting to this day ... The reason for my surprise and being humbled is that for many years Auntie Dot in the last how many years seemed created a distance from the mainstream of the old times and yes avoiding the invites of even my Sis Sandra to attend family functions .. and also yes avoiding the goodbyes in the form of funerals etc even my Moms ... Not that I can blame her .. I can echo my Moms words in her last few years .. " I'm so tired of the goodbyes "
Since Clive and I have made contact via the site we had a joking expression that the only way to get his Mom to any invited function to do with Oranjemund connections would be to drug her .. roll her in a carpet and transport her there .. awaking to find herself in the situation and deal with it ...
Well despite Auntie Dots supposed absence from the Oranjemund mainstream .. the memorial service revealed the other side of Auntie Dot that I was not aware of ... and too late...
Auntie Dot was very actively involved in the Salvation Army Womens League for many years than we were aware of , caring for the fallen of society .. an extension of her caring and selfless nature mentioned earlier .. Also a gentleman from her bank FNB gardens giving tribute saying how she engaged them as extended family and taught them " to listen " The Reverend Kaye recalling how on every Sunday morning she would be there at service , always engaging him .. and yes he shedding his tear for her in front of us all , but reminding us to celebrate her life ... And yes how beautiful and fitting to have someone who was a friend officiate at her service and wish her well on her new lifes journey ...
In the last few months in communication with Clive have said that I would like to visit Auntie Dot ,, I was cautioned that it would have to be a "surprise" or in her words , "let me check my diary " ...
Unfortunately I did not get to that opportunity of seeing her again ... I'm sure it would have been a joyfull moment and the contact reminding me of the warmth of my Mom who was a good friend of hers ..
A reminder to stop stand still reflect .. put your daily cares and worries aside .. make the time ... I can from my heart say I wish that I could have had that moment .. but now have to say enjoy your new journey Auntie Dot , you are in good hands ... we all become fellow travelers in time , no regret , no judgement .. this is life ...
I have included the picture that was framed at her service ... Auntie Dot albeit knocking on the door of 8 decades still reflecting the beauty of her younger years .. a mothers beauty never fades ...
A great thank you Sandy, for the piece you have just written.
It was read with tears in my eyes and brought back even more memories of the privilages we enjoyed growing up as children in Oranjemund with the "extended families"
The Hockney's,Kilbride's, Ockwel's, Winstanley's, Selby's,Bennett's and Baker's to name but a few, I often felt that I had more "uncle' & aunt's watching over & keeping me in check than I could handle.
My Mom told me of some of the street people she spoke to and helped whenever she could. She always gave what she could, if not something or other to eat she would tell me that she spent time talking to those on the street and less fortunate.
She wanted to take the troubles of the world on her shoulders and change things. I often told her it was not possible to help everyone, but she would always try. Giving clothes in winter to keep the street kids warm, buying a pie for regulars she knew on the street. Each and every person she could help she would and if she couldnt she would feel bad that she had been unable to help, the crime, violence and general state of the world really weighed heavy on her heart.
When my Dad died in 1991, my Moms world fell apart, from what I have seen, she withdrew completely and could never really accept the fact that he was no longer around, she put her life on hold. Commimg to Cape Town and getting involved with the salvation army gave her a purpose, as did living for her grand children. Only last week she said she had had enough of death & funerals and indicated that she was "sick & tired of all her friends dying around her". Mom said she would not be going to any more funerals, I definitly did not expect hers to be the next .
Mum always said that she would only be truley happy when she was reunited with my Dad, I now know this to be true, The look of peace on her face allows me to believe it.
The words spoken at her service give me even more strength, but its in the quiet moments, looking through family photographs and picking up small items like Christmas Servietts and knowing she will not be there to talk to on my Birthday or at Christmas that it really gets to me, and the tears start flowing.
Sandy,thanks for the call It is appreciated.
wanted to be wil my dad
In Good Grace accepted Clive .. like I said wish I could have had that moment with her ... Peace in knowing she is now reunited and happy .. producitve and caring to her chosen end of her earth journey ... what more could we ask ??
Sandy, the Scanner is being fixed so be prepared to help in adding names to photos you may never have seen.
I don't think we truly realize what gems we have until we lose them.
Too true too true ,,,
You guys have got me all a crying now. Beautifull.
Something writen on a picture frame I bought for a photo of my dad after he died not so long ago. " The best things in life are not things". Doesn't matter how old you are when you loose a parent you still a children and you still need your parent. Once again my thoughts are with you Clive.You Mom's passing has brought back a whole bunch of feelings I had at the time of my fathers death .
Aunty Dot was one of the true O'mund Mommy's to all back in the day.
3d smiles(281)
Diana .. I go back to the simple words that my maid Norma of many years said to me when my Mom passed .. I was doing final assembly of the collage of her very intersting life , just before the memorial service ... Norma walked in .. I asked her if she wanted to attend the memorial service .. she said no ... better she not be there .. but then she embraced me , held me tight and said .. Sandy .. every time you lose a parent or someone you love .. you have to grow up some more .. especially a parent ... indeed her simple words remain so true .. and yes have been well applied in the last 10 years of my life .. I have grown and continue so , not without obstacle but yes with those words echoing in my heart ...