Garrys reimported Jokes.

[georg ruf jr.]

 

[georg ruf jr.]

If this does not touch your heart, then you just don't have one.....

An incredible story of luck and inspiration!









Can you believe it? This guy wins $181 million in the lottery last Wednesday, and then finds the love of his life just 2 days later.

Talk about LUCK!

[Diana Rudd (Boehme)]

Well if I had $181million dollars I'm sure I to would find many loves of my life within 2 days.

[SandyB]

Including many long  lost relatives and friends crawling out of the woodwork   .... well put Diana   

[georg ruf jr.]

Sory. The pic wouldn't upload. Bitmap doesn't go on this site.

[georg ruf jr.]

Doctor Steve had slept with one of his patients and felt guilty all day
long. No matter how much he tried to forget about it, he couldn't. The
guilt and sense of betrayal was overwhelming. But every now and then he'd
hear an reasuring inner voice in his head that said:
"Steve, don't worry about it. You aren't the first medical practitioner to
sleep with one of their patients and you won't be the last. And you're
single. Just let it go."
But invariably another voice in his head would bring him back to reality
whispering...
Steve....
Steve ......
Steve...........
Steve.............
STEVE....
............you're a vet!

[georg ruf jr.]

Police in London have found a bomb outside a mosque.

They've told the public not to panic as they've managed to push it
inside.

[georg ruf jr.]

Two Asian heroin addicts have injected themselves with curry powder by
mistake - both are in intensive care...

One has a dodgy tikka and the other one is in a korma.

[georg ruf jr.]

I just saw that Harry Potter film. A bit unrealistic if you ask me. I
mean, a ginger haired kid, with two friends?

[georg ruf jr.]

I was reading in the paper today about this dwarf that got pick
pocketed.

How could anyone stoop so low?

[georg ruf jr.]

I was walking down the road when I saw an Afghan bloke standing on a
fifth floor balcony shaking a carpet.

I shouted up to him, "What's up Abdul, won't it start?"

[toonfandangl]

..............like the Harry Potter one.................

[SandyB]

 Now  now  Georg ... ginger  hair with  more than two friends ....   I  recall you all had thick auburn  hair ,,, close relative to  the ginger cousins ...  thankfully the only ginger hair  I  have  is on my arms ...  scots blood ....   

[georg ruf jr.]

A blonde calls Delta Airlines and asks, 'Can you tell me how long it'll take   

to fly from   San Francisco  to   New York City  ?'   

The agent replies, 'Just a minute.'

'Thank you,' the blonde says, and hangs up.

[georg ruf jr.]

A man is recovering from surgery when the Surgical Nurse appears and asks   

Him how he is feeling.   

'I'm O. K. But I didn't like the four letter-words the doctor used in surgery,' he answered.   

'What did he say,' asked the nurse.   

'Oops!'