INTERNET SCAMS

[SandyB]

Hoo  boy  have I been getting my fair share  of  scamster offers via various sites .. the DA  site hotmail  and tagged .. the below i have posted is the most hilarious  because of the name ... Read  below ....


FROM: DR. PETER MCWEALTH DIRECTOR: WORLD FUND DISCOVERY MANAGEMENT AND PAYMENT BUREAU. Tel:+44 702 406 7752 This letter is from World Fund Discovery Management And Payment Bureau newly invented by the World Financial Service Authority United States Of America/United Kingdom. This body was set up to discover an outstanding unpaid fund being owned to Governments or Individuals all over the world through Contract Payment, Inheritance and Lottery Winning Prize Awards. It will interest you to know that we have discovered an outstanding unpaid/unclaimed sum of money in favor of your name and a mandate has been given to this body World Fund Discovery Management And Payment Bureau to ensure that this fund gets to you without any delay. Note that a special payment arrangement has been made to deliver this fund to you through diplomatic means of payment or Alternatively come in person to any of our payment Offices in Europe, America or Asia. You are advised to furnish this office with your contact information to enable us open up communication with you regarding the release of your fund immediately,Respond to my email address (peterwealth1177@yahoo.com.hk) Thanks. Yours Truly Dr. Peter McWealth.

DR PETER MC WEALTH ??? NOW  COME ON ..  THATS REALLY A HORRENDOUSLY FAKE  NIGERIAN  MADE UP  SCOTS NAME ...      THANKS GOODNESS I'M SANE ....

[Diana Rudd (Boehme)]

       and as for their grammer. 

[toonfandangl]

ssss

Sandy! you mean its a fake!!...................You will be telling me the Tooth Fairy does not exist....................

[Bertie Horak]

Sandy, I had the same! Damn, so you say I shouldn't fly to Europe then?  He-he...

I also had a strange phone-call yesterday from a person I think is trying to scam me.  He said he called from Canada and asked if I had herbs to sell.  His accent was definitely not American or French, he said his name is Viv Volko and that he is a herbalist doing research.  He was wondering if I can supply him with a South African herb (Arctopus, or "sieketroos") which grows wild from Namaqualand to the South coast.

I asked him to e-mail me with more info.  He did, and when I asked where he got my telephone number, he said he got it from my website???  --I dont have a website!!!!

This is quite tempting.  He said he wanted 100kg of the dried root of the plant.  The going rate by other companies are $9,99 per 10 grams!!! That means I can make a profit of at least R700 000 if I could supply him with the herb.  Tempting, tempting...

But somehow I still think it is a scam...

[Michael Alexander]

There is also a NEDBANK one doing the rounds of late,

ANY BANK THAT SAYS THEY NEED YOU TO REINPUT YOUR BANK DETAILS OTHERWISE YOUR ACCOUNT WILL BE CLOSED>>>

is not a real bank, just delete the email....

[Andrew Darné]

Just as irritating are these stupid e-mails of  "send to 10 people or ...." What a lot of k*k.
I blew up the other day when someone at work forwarded the hoax about Ericsson giving away a free laptop for forwarding a mail to 20 people + a supposed employee at Ericsson. I found this one to be a hoax about 6 years ago and it just p*ss*d me off to see that folk still fall sucker to the same old junk; besides being a total waste of corporate time and unncessary congestion to IT infrastructure/networks/bandwidth... with all those useless chain e-mails flying around. I replied to all and shared my thoughts with them about their stupidity... 1 soul replied in total agreeance.
I was suprised.

[toonfandangl]

The biggest threat to your computer is opening emails from people you know that are to lazy to Delete other email address within the original....................................

[SandyB]

So Agreed  Andrew .. I  tick off  my indiscrimnate  sending    send  to all  friends regularly ...  tell them to only send me stuff with value .. If  I find a message  beautiful , meaningful etc  but  it  has  the  veiled threat  of  send to   20  . or  else ... I quietly  give thanks for the message content , but  state that iI do not subscribe to this  sort of  blackmail .. and  if  I find the message  worth storing I first  clean ip  up  of all unecessary  e mail addresses and the  guilt trip threats ..
below  a  good  skit on the  email  " industry "
LIKE I SAY  IS THIS  CABBAGE  GREEN ?? NAH !!     


I just want to thank all of you for your educational e-mails over the past year. I am totally screwed up now and have little chance of recovery.



I no longer open a public bathroom door without using a paper towel or have them put lemon slices in my ice water without worrying about the bacteria on the lemon peel.

I can't use the remote in a hotel room because I don't know what the last person was doing while flipping through the adult movie channels.

I can't sit down on the hotel bedspread because I can only imagine what has happened on it since it was last washed.

I have trouble shaking hands with someone who has been driving because the number one pastime while driving alone is picking ones nose (although mobile) phone usage may be taking the number one spot).

Eating a little snack sends me on a guilt trip because I can only imagine how many gallons of Trans fats I have consumed over the years.


I can't touch any woman's purse for fear she has placed it on the floor of a public bathroom.


I MUST SEND MY SPECIAL THANKS to whoever sent me the one about poop in the glue on envelopes because I now have to use a wet sponge with every envelope that needs sealing.



ALSO,now I have to scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason.
 

I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl (Penny Brown) who is about to die in the hospital for the 1,387,258th time.

I no longer have any money at all, but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Bill Gates/Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special e-mail program.

I no longer worry about my soul because I have 363,214 angels looking out for me, and St. Theresa's Novena has granted my every wish.


I no longer eat KFC because their chickens are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers..

I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.

THANKS TO YOU I have learned that my prayers only get answered if I forward an e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.

BECAUSE OF YOUR CONCERN, I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains.


I no longer can buy petrol or diesel without taking someone along to watch the car so a serial killer won't crawl in my back seat when I'm filling up.



I no longer drink Pepsi or Fanta since the people who make these products are atheists who refuse to put 'Under God' on their cans.


I no longer use Cling Wrap in the microwave because it causes cancer.

AND THANKS FOR LETTING ME KNOW I can't boil a cup of water in the microwave anymore because it will blow up in my face... Disfiguring me for life.

I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS.

I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a perfume sample and rob me..

I no longer receive packages from UPS or Fed Ex since they are actually Al Qaeda in disguise.
I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica , Uganda , Singapore , and Uzbekistan ...

I no longer buy expensive cookies from Woolies since I now have their recipe.

THANKS TO YOU I can't use anyone's toilet but mine because a big brown African spider is lurking under the seat to cause me instant death when it bites my butt.


AND THANKS TO YOUR GREAT ADVICE I can't ever pick up $5.00 dropped in the parking lot because it probably was placed there by a sex molester waiting underneath my car to grab my leg.

I can no longer drive my car because I can't buy petrol from certain fuel companies!

I can't do any gardening because I'm afraid I'll get bitten by the Violin Spider and my hand will fall off.

If you don't send this e-mail to at least 144,000 people in the next 70 minutes, a large dove with diarrhea will land on your head at 5:00 p.m. Tomorrow afternoon and the fleas from 12 camels will infest your back, causing you to grow a hairy hump. I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my next door neighbors' ex-mother-in-law's second husband's cousin's beautician . . .


Oh, by the way.....

A German scientist from Argentina , after a lengthy study, has discovered that people with insufficient brain activity read their e-mail with their hand on the mouse..

Don't bother taking it off now, it's too late.



I now keep my toothbrush in the living room, because water splashes over 2 m. out of the commode.

[Alfred Boehme]

I got a good one for you pass this onto 10 people and you will receive a thump


I wander if they will still pess it on

[SandyB]

Indeed doey so ....  they need a thump to drive out the dumb ..

[toonfandangl]

The last email that I received  knew I was going to delete the cr..!! message, because they said that 99.9 percent would not pass it on and would delete it .......so who am I to disappoint them.....................