Mistaken identity -- a truly sad story

[SandyB]

Me  left  work early  today  .. feeling very heavy in  my heart ...  the story .....
This morning at about 10:30  I get a call from  front gate security .. they say  a Shane  person wants to see  me   . i ask  from which company .. No  not from a company .. I ask in connection with a job .. No !  he  just insists  he must see you .. Ok me irritated , but  yes  I  go down .. as i'm walking toward the gate I see this young man looking intently at me .. somehow i recognise him ...  I introduce myself  .. so he ask me  " do you recognise me ? " i say yes  something in my memory is  doing recognition .. so he says to me  voice charged with emotion  and  visibly shaking  " yes you should  you are my father  , you had an affair with  my mother 21 years ago " 

WHOOPS !!  now I know where the recognition comes from .. I ask him " is your mother  Geraldine ?? " he replies   Yes ...
I told him to come inside  ... arranged some tea and a  sarmie  .. told him to wait  as I  had a meeting  .. would be back in  15 mins or so .. 
The  actual story ... Geraldine  was a clerk that  did stats work for me years ago  ..  attractive intelligent , good at her job  , a lot going for her only problem was  a weakness for booze and  choice of men , always bad ,  she  f**ked up royally each time in choice of boyfriend or husband ..
At one stage she got married to a guy that beat her up ... he used to come to work and accuse me of  haviing an affair with her .. I think the result of the fact that I had a soft spot for her   broken wing syndrome ... always trying to bouy her up realise her self worth  and that she was  good at what she did ..
Anyhow during this period she had hectic bonk  affair with  one of the  electricians at work ... this guy was a dog ... he was married had a beautiful wife and kids .. was having the bonk affair with  the Geraldine and  someone else i also knew ..  i used to say " Robert   how much is enough ? "  he would just grin ... actually a nice guy only prob not being able to keep dick in  pants and faithfull  to one .. the more the merrier seemed to be his   credo ..
Anyhow she while married to the bastard  gave birth to a very  fair haired and skinned  boy .. I heard the usual shop floor  skinner  , but then it  was  her life and not mine ..
She then left this  beat up  wifey bastard  and then got married to a  total  drunkard that worked for the council .. now things  totally unravveled ..  to the point that she lost her job .. i could protect her no more ..  due disciplinary  course had to take place despite being  sent to rehab etc  she just kept on falling down  .. i had her one daughter arrive at work telling me that there was no food at home .. she and the  suipgat were just lying around in stupor and throwing  knives at each other ..  anyhhow  that was the end of Geraldine ..  a  sad  chapter closed , a  potentially good  person  and employee  laid herself to waste ...
Anyhow i spent about an hour with this  young man of 21  talking  .. very aware of him looking me over carefully ... checking me  ..  am i lying .. meanwhile heres me  looking at him and seeing the  combination of  his mother and  father .. a fine specimen ... but so  broken ...and yes emotional  .. his intent was today to come and confront  the father  " where have you been for the last 21 years ? "
STORY .. he was abandoned by his mom at 1 years old , ended up with  an aunt and eventually foisted off to the   nasty beat up  ex husband as his kid  during the  ended marriage .. ( now  you see where the  affair  story came from ?  blonde blue eyes man ..  and he had to look after this poisened fruit ?? ) well his  story  is one of abuse ) obviously the  "wicked stepfather" told him  that his mother was having an affair with me .. anyhow as he explained he very truthfully told me he felt  directionless ..got into wrong company , even ended up doing  housebreak crime ...  OUCH ! ...
I  ahd to tell him  who his father was  and his shennaigans ... and yes that his father is no more , died of a heart attack  12 years ago ..  also I gave him the truth about his biological father  .. 
A true bird of broken wing  and not of his making .. all I could offer was closure re his father .. his mom currntly in hospital  organ failure from years of alcohol  abuse .. also i have contacted members of his family including  his mothers brother who works for me .. asked him to despite any misgivings  try to  integrate him into  their fold ..  I'm sure that  LOVE will help heal ... 
I  gave him some cash and my cell #   keep in contact .. even if you just want to talk .. I will try within my abilities to see what I can do vis employment ( hopes not high  but nothing ventured nothing gained ?? hey )
His closing words were  "  I'm sorry to have wasted you valuable time "  my reply was  to the effect " No you were courageous enough to try and confront one of your   demons ..  what you ahve is closure  and someone who will  see  if he can do anything totry help  undo the damage , thats important "
Aah ! I'm so hurt inside at  hearing this . and yes as Diana said we wish we could just all make it right  .. but then again we  not        godmothers ...  i dont know if  I have put  across  what happened today properly but there it is in its  whole ... 
Another  reason  for gratitude ..  whenever  anyone of us thinks they been done a shit deal .. hey this young mans story  is indeed a tragedy ..

[Rhona]

Bloody hell - and here was I thinking I was having a bad day - 
That poor guy has spent the last how many years of his life living a lie within a living hell - Sandy, you truley are an angel, you could so easily of told him to p*ss off as many others would; but no - you took him in and helped him the best you could with the addition of your cell number to call you if things ever got too much  to you my friend.

[Bertie Horak]

@ Sandy - I want to echo what Rhona said.  If YOU were not part of the whole picture here, who knows what direction the poor child would have taken today?  Just knowing there's somebody who didn't throw him away must have meant a lot.  I agree, Sandy, you're better than a fairy godmother, you're an angel!  I hope your heart feels lighter soon as it is filled with compassion and love!

[SandyB]

Rhona  me still sidelined .. and yes  shedding tears for this young man .. I will phone his mothers brother again   tonight  .. he owes me favour for helping   him and wife through  their daughters drug problem  ( lots of  sound advice that got them through  the crisis )  he must now be  as strong as the  personal time and  24hrs advice i gave ... a sort of passing  of the gift on  if one may term it as so ...  he not my family , but yes  his  job now is  to embrace and  give love and support to this  young man that summoned up the courage ...  
Yes Hon and we should be in eternal gratitude for   for what we got ... wild but yes good parents ...
I  now  need a good nap to try shed this fug ...

[georgswa (Georg Ruf) (RIP)]

Sad story Sandy

I guess you got yourself a step son now.

Built him up as you can. Its all not his fault. Wish you good luck, at first i thought its your son, was a bit unclear to me and i thought of Berties remark the other day, no kids that he knows off

You must know what really transpired thoes days....

[SandyB]

No Georg , my writings are clear on that one , the father is the bonkbeast .. and he understands it , I explained my  life to him .. I will just be watcher  and listener .. call in  favours ... see what the collective  of good thoughts and  intent can do ...

[georgswa (Georg Ruf) (RIP)]

I understood at second reading only, its no joke at all what happened today, very sad.....

[Michael Alexander]

Good Job Sandy, You will have given this young chap hope, and perhaps a friendship.... the right kind, not some criminal induced way of life...... It will take time. though....

[SandyB]

Again  .. what I been  echoing over the last few days  ...  Folks  .. let us be in gratitude ..  we had the best ... and may we never be blind to those that have had the cards stacked against them ... Time for my nap and try release some of this  hurt i was  feeling throughout the conversation  ..  its like beestings ..

[SandyB]

Hell  man whats worse .. I'm supposed to be meeting Florrie and Hubbie tonight ....   although they  have   not phoned me ..and me fragile at moment .. but then again .. Mothers words " stiff upper lip " ... just want quietness  ...

[Michele Alexander (Voden)]

Sandy - all I can say is that it's a great pity there aren't more people in the world like you!

[Diana Rudd (Boehme)]

 

[SandyB]

Well I had my nap  ,, a few good scotches beforehand while writing this story and then sweet slumber  .. woke up feeling better  .. I done what was within my  power at the moment .. went down the road for a good steak ..and relax , just back in .. and now an early night ...  I hope my further conversation with mothers brother  helps get something moving ....  as i said  reintegrate with known family .. but yes I'm there  to talk to  if really necessary ...

[Patricia Lotte]

Sandy, you're the best  I think this poor lad knows that if he needs some sound advice or just someone to talk to, he can come to you. We all need that special someone in our lives.

[Delia]

Sandy, this broken bird was lead by wise unseen forces to your doorstep........thank goodness he didn't resist otherwise he wouldn't have found his guardian angel waiting for him. As painful as it must've been for him to hear the truth about his father, within that knowing lies the seeds of healing.  Your kindness and just being there for him will be his guiding light.  As Rhona said, you could've turned your back on him saying "not my problem" but you didn't..............you will be richly blessed.  Why can't there be lots more Sandy's in the world?????